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Dave with his Wife on local restaurant

Dave takes his wife out to a local restaurant and as they're eating their dinner he drops his fork.

A waiter appears and replaces it with a new one.

Dave is very impressed by this and decides to test the waiter by dropping his napkin this time.

Sure enough, the waiter replaces it with a new one.

Dave thinks about this for a moment and then pushes his wife off of her chair...

I have a complaint!!!

Santa stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, "I have a complaint!"

"Yes, Sir ?" said the librarian looking up at him.

"I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!"

Puzzled by his complain the librarian asked "What was wrong with it?"

"It had way too many characters and there was no plot whatsoever!" said Santa.

The librarian nodded and said, "Ahhh. So you must be the person who took our phone book."

Understanding a Women

Understand​ing a woman is like downloadin​g a 1 GB file With 2 Kbps speed...

And when you have downloaded​ half of it you will get an error "Download Failed!!!"

A wife in need is a wife indeed

A male driver is pulled over by a cop and the following conversation takes place:

Man: What's the problem officer?

Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.

Man: No sir, I was going 65.

Wife: Oh Harry. You were going 80.

Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light.

Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!

Wife: Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks.

Cop: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt.

Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car.

Wife: Oh Harry, you never wear your seat belt.

Man: Shut your mouth!!!

Cop: Mam, does your husband always talk to you this way?

Wife: No, only when he's drunk!!!


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